Monday, December 8, 2008

Dookie

But it here

In my last post I referred to "Dookie on a Stick." Not two days later, I was posting on Facebook about the dookie. Kind of weird how things like that happen. I hadn't thought of the phrase for years, and there I was using it twice in the same week. I figured it was a sign that "Dookie on a Stick" had to be immortalized on a mug.

The phrase came from a kid that I went to grade school with. I was reminded of some of his other inspirational tomes, such as "Bubble eyed tree monster" and "(insert famous person), He's my cousin."

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Ha. Finally a new post




Buy it here.

I said I was bad at doing this kind of stuff. Didn't think I was this bad. Halloween and Thanksgiving have passed. Christmas is coming, and I have actually added some new products.

Hops..Better than mistletoe. What good is mistletoe anyway? Sure, they say you can get kissed under it. But look at the Wikipedia entry:

The word 'mistletoe' is of uncertain etymology; it may be related to German Mist, for dung and Tang for branch, but Old English mistel was also used for basil.

Dung Branch. Dookie on a stick. That's romantic.

I say replace mistletoe with a mighty bunch of hop cones. If a poo stick can get you a kiss, imagine what you'll get with the fragrance of seraphim.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Wow, I'm pretty crappy at this


Buy It

Almost two weeks since my last post. I guess I'll explain the whole "Air Lock Sniffer" t-shirt. For non brewers, the two questions are usually "What's and airlock, and why would you sniff it?"

An airlock is placed on a fermenter to prevent nasties(bacteria, mold) from attacking the wort (unfermented beer). The air lock allows the CO2 produced by fermentation to escape, while not allowing any air to enter.

The one pictured in "Air Lock Sniffer" is a three-piece air lock. You fill the main compartment with water. The center piece will float up while being filled with CO2, until its tipping point is reached. It then tips slightly to one side, releasing the CO2, and starting the process over.

Why would you sniff an air lock? Because at it's best, it's the scent of heaven. Fresh hops mixed with yeasty goodness. At its worst, it smells like hell if you use a yeast which throws sulfur during fermentation. I usually use SAFALE US-05 ale yeast, which has the heavenly scent.

Sunday, October 5, 2008

Ichabod's Revenge



BUY IT NOW
I was going to brew it up. Really I was, but my Half Hearted ale depleted all of my specialty grains. So, I designed a label for it first. Hopefully it will be brewed by the end of October, and being enjoyed around the holidays.



From kenlenard on the Brewboard

Spiced Pumpkin Ale

8 lbs 2-row Pale Malt
8 oz Crystal 120°L
4 oz Brown Sugar (into the boil)
1.5 oz Chocolate
1.5 oz Roasted Barley

30 ounces Libby Pumpkin (from grocery store... right into the mash)
1 oz Vanguard 4.4% for 60 minutes

1½ tablespoons McCormick Pumpkin Pie Spice steeped in brewpot (lid on) for 15 minutes after flameout

1½ tablespoons McCormick Pumpkin Pie Spice steeped in some Bacardi Spice or Captain Morgan for 1-2 days and added to the secondary, rack the beer on top

White Labs 01 California Ale Yeast

OG: 1.050, FG: 1.012, IBU: 20, SRM: 15, ABV: 4.8%

Save the Burnt Chips

I was eating some chips the other day, when my palate was slapped with a piece of nostalgia.

There it was. I thought it was extinct. The elusive burnt chip. I flashed back to the early eighties, of eating potato chips from the generic black and white

POTATO CHIPS

POTATO CHIPS

POTATO CHIPS

bag.

I'm not talking about the burnt beyond recognition chips. No, these are the chips that have been in the fryer just a tad longer than normal. While going through my Unwrapped addiction, I learned that they now employ high speed cameras and artificial intelligence to terminate these morsels of scrumptiousness. Compared to these gems, regular chips are bland conveyers of oil and salt.

Anyway, join in the fight to save the burnt chips. Buy a tshirt or mug to help save these rare beauties.


BUY THEM HERE

Monday, September 29, 2008

Wow

I have to pretty up to store front some. Just noticed the generic splurge

"Welcome!
Welcome to my new online store! Thanks to CafePress.com, I am now selling a number of products with unique graphics on them. Please feel free to browse my store and buy anything you like!"

Got this thinging all set up

Check out the t-shirt place first

www.patiobrewing.com


I'll ad some rants and t-shirt explanations later.